i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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