You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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