Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
