my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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