she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
