2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
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