i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
