Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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