Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
That's intense
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize