WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
