I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
