sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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