too bad you live with your parents still
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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