Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
