What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
love makes seman taste better
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
BRING THE BAGELS
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
