yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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