That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
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