I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
