Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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