my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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