why didn't you poke me back
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
