I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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