Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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