Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
