The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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