i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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