none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
