I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
