Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
