If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
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