My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
