i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
