Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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