So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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