I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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