What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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