Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize