Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
