If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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