dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
50% drunk capacity currently
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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