i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize