hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She told me I should be a condom model.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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