No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
