Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
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