It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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