i barfeds in our rink
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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