You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
