Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
