before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
