i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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