marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
